I Wish I Could Feel Things the Way You Do

I wish I could feel things the way you do, my sweet boy. I want to understand. I didn’t know sound could physically, deeply hurt until you showed me. I see you fold your precious ears in on themselves, an attempt to mute the overwhelming world. That doesn’t usually work though. So, you quietly, nervously, moan. This slowly grows in intensity and frequency until your shrieking blocks out the unwanted sound or it’s removed. Whichever comes first. I want to explain to others how you feel inside during these moments.…

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Can You Feel My Vibe?

My son, who was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD), was also diagnosed with Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD). As part of his profile, he has a heightened sensitivity to light, sound and the energy of his environment. To navigate loud places, or areas that have unexpected sounds, has been challenging. We found bright lights could be over stimulating, making movie theatres, fairs and arcades unpredictable. He would become so revved up, literally bouncing from one thing to another, and his impulse control was non-existent. He also became disregulated by itchy…

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The Aftermath of Sensory Overload

Sometimes I forget our lives don’t look like others. It’s probably a survival mechanism, and thinking about it, I’m grateful I have these moments where our lives feel normal to me. But to others? It’s far from typical, or expected, or usual. My son has had a lot of excitement over the past couple weeks. His fourth birthday party went so well, but it came at the cost of the aftermath. He actually handles changes in routine pretty well in moments – we’ve figured out how to help him navigate…

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Unexpected Spectrum

When my wife Tammy and I met, we had four children between us; two from her first marriage, and two from mine. After a few years of being married we became like any other couple. We talked about having a child. We had yours and mine, and now we wanted the ours. Tammy, having her tubes tied after her second child, made it a little more difficult to get what we wanted. We could choose the surgery route to reverse her previous procedure, which costs a lot of money with…

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To My Husband this Father’s Day

You are my rock. You are the reason I’m able to manage all we have endured together. You’ve never left my side no matter what the experience. We are one month shy of our 5-year wedding anniversary, yet we’ve been through so much in just our first few years of marriage. A conversion of faith that would eventually guide us in the midst of chaos. Hardship from having three kids in the NICU. Countless surgeries, procedures, and doctor appointments for our three little ones. Diagnoses like autism, sensory processing disorder,…

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Autism and Siblings…Now What?

Autism Awareness month has ended and we now have an official diagnosis…for the second time.  Let me clarify. My son received a very early diagnosis thanks to my daughter.  You see our girl had her difficulties in language development leading to early intervention services.  Yet no autism diagnosis. We did the developmental doctor visit and left with a language developmental delay and sensory processing disorder as I was hugely pregnant with our son.  Do I dare say relief? As our daughter’s language developed it was a breath of fresh air. …

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A Solution for Sound Sensitivity

While individuals diagnosed with autism and other sensory disorders can have a broad spectrum of symptoms, there is one symptom that seems to be more universal than others: sensitivity to noise. For those of us that aren’t as sensitive to noise, it may not be obvious, but parks, playgrounds, restaurants, shopping malls, busy city streets, airports, birthday parties, movie theaters, school cafeterias (the list goes on), can all feel painfully loud for individuals with autism and other sensory disorders. While you can try to limit your child’s exposure to loud…

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Creating a Sensory Friendly Space

One of the pieces of advice I have received over the years from therapists, educators and even parents of adult autistic children, was to make our home sensory friendly. In my mind that sounded overwhelming. Did that mean more stuff in my living room? Did that mean spending more money on stuff my son wouldn’t use or even try? I already felt like our house was kid friendly. It was covered in toys, Legos, balls, and Nerf Gun bullets. We had kid size chairs, blankets and fidgets every where. Wasn’t…

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Grieving Over Two Very Different Things

In December 2012, I had a baby girl but she ended up passing away to SIDS three days after my husband came home from a deployment. We were devastated and broken. Our whole family was. It was some dark times. One month later we found out we were expecting again. I said this time I’m going to do everything different. I ate better. I cloth diapered. I made organic baby food. I wanted to breastfeed. I was so scared of SIDS happening. I just didn’t want to ever go through…

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Thank You to the Best Aunt and Uncle

After our son Emmett’s official Fragile X diagnosis we told all our family members about it and posted about it on social media. Everyone told us or wrote to us telling us how much they care and how it will be OK and if we needed anything to let them know. But after the Fragile X diagnosis their was a quiet pause from these individuals. No one says anything or asks us about Emmett. They don’t ask about the multiple diagnosis’ he received after the Fragile X diagnosis. I have often…

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