Marriage
A Diagnosis For My Boy
Four years ago I watched you from my son’s bedroom window as you went back and forth with your colleague in your car– attempting to convince her that my son had autism. You both had just evaluated him. I understood the urgency– I knew that you understood. I didn’t have a fancy job title and didn’t have an outwardly impact on our society. I didn’t possess any powers and my neighbors didn’t know my name. I didn’t have anything to give or anything to spend other than being the best…
Read MoreHow Having an Autistic Child Affected My Marriage
To say our son was a challenging baby is an understatement. He didn’t sleep through the night for four years. We functioned in a constant state of exhaustion. He screamed most of his infancy. He struggled to eat. He struggled to poop. He was never content. He had never ending severe ear infections and multiple tubal surgeries. He missed milestones. He was even misdiagnosed a few times. Because of his delays and no real diagnosis the medical debt from therapy started piling onto the credit cards. Money got tight. And…
Read MoreThe Emotions That Accompany Special Needs Parenting
One of the main reasons I started blogging about my life with an autistic child was to help other parents learn to talk about the emotions that go into raising a child with a lifelong disability. I knew what I was feeling and I knew I couldn’t be alone. Yet, it felt that way. The Roller Coaster If you are anything like me the whole thing feels like a rollercoaster. In the beginning you would’ve done anything for your child to not be on the spectrum. Maybe you were in denial.…
Read MoreI Blamed Autism for My Divorce
I am sitting here in my living room, feet up in a recliner, drinking a much-needed cup of coffee. One kiddo is off to school and one is at daycare and my house is finally quiet. I know I should get up and start my work day but I am distracted. I have been staring at the stack of my divorce papers for 15 minutes. I find a bit of irony in the fact that they are covered with our autistic son’s ‘treasures’. A few chewed up family pictures, an…
Read MoreBack to Reality
Jamie and I are back from our quick vacation in Washington DC. It was so amazing to feel like a grown up. I think I started to forget what it was like. We ate and drank and slept. And we only had one deep, ‘what does the future hold’, conversation about Cooper. And wow was the break refreshing. Everyone deserves a break from the worry. If you let it the worry will suffocate you. And as parent’s of kiddos with needs we know all too well what that is like. Don’t get…
Read MoreAnother Baby
Hubs was feeding Sawyer a bottle the other day and I made a comment about how cute they looked. Hubs said, “well, this is most likely my last baby so I want to soak it up.” STAB TO THE HEART. In another life I would have had 4 or 5 babies. I love babies. All I ever wanted to be was a mom. I love being pregnant and the excitement of waiting to meet the new love of my life. I love the baby grunts and the smell and nursing and…
Read MoreRaising a Child With Needs and Your Marriage
Having a baby changes your whole life. Time changes. The days are long. I used to say, “Cooper gets us up at the crack of dawn and doesn’t quit until he collapses at bedtime.” Before we had Cooper, our marriage was very strong. We wanted a baby so badly and got pregnant easily. When you are pregnant, and even before, you picture what life with this baby is going to be like. My husband went to college on a baseball scholarship and I played sports as well so I pictured…
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