I have four kids. They range from 1 to 11. And while they are all carbon copies of each other visually, they are each very unique. When I describe them I often say my Cooper, he sees people. He has the gift of sight that most will never have. I describe my Sawyer as being an old soul. He is thoughtful and kind. My baby, she is stronger willed than any human I have met in my life. And she’s unbelievably smart. She runs this house at 17 months. And…
Read More
This morning I drove my middle son Sawyer to school. He typically rides the bus but he wanted to donate a handful of toys to the toy drive his school was holding so I drove him. ‘The toys go to Children’s Hospital mom.’ He was adamant about bringing presents. As we drove he asked me a zillion questions. As a mom, I’ve learned that some of the best conversations happen in the car. After asking me about multiplying 8’s and 9’s and something he saw on YouTube, he said, ‘mama,…
Read MoreI’ve learned as I’ve aged that the biggest, most memorable moments of our lives, are often the ones we least expect. Of course a wedding, the birth of our babies, an anniversary, are the best. But other ones sneak in. When you least expect them. A solo car ride with your son. A walk with your aging parent. Staying up way too late drinking wine with your husband. Coffee with a friend. Or when your first born watches his first ever movie, start to finish, with your family on movie…
Read More
When it comes to parenting a child with a disability, there are parts that we as parents share. But there are some parts that we don’t talk about. Respect. Dignity. Maybe because we don’t think to share it. Or because maybe no one will believe us. Or it’s just our norm. This morning I found myself doing something that me and my husband do daily with our son Cooper. We don’t talk about it anymore, unless there is something of note. He is 11 years old and has a diagnosis…
Read More
The number one question I get asked is, do you want more kids? It’s a very tricky subject. It’s something that I struggle with daily if I’m being honest, something I’ve intensely prayed about. I’ve always loved the idea of a bunch of kids running around. Ever since I was a little girl I wanted six kids. I wanted to adopt two and birth four. I didn’t grow up wanting to be a foster parent. Actually, that desire didn’t come until much later in life. But God opened that door…
Read MoreThe comment said…It’s always about the special needs kids. You parents are always whining for them to get everything.” That comment was from a while back and it was in response to a post about how children with special needs/disabilities were forgotten during covid. A bold statement yes, but also true. It was made be a lady. One the same age as me. One with kids. She felt that everything is just handed to kids in special education. The statement has been in my head for a week now. Running…
Read More
I read a post this morning from the amazing Jillian Benfield about IEP Wounds. I believe everyone should read it. And I believe that words come into our lives at the exact moments we need to read them and feel them. I felt the tears start to fall this morning while I simultaneously nodded along with her words. I’m not going to rewrite what she wrote because she said it perfectly. But here is what I want to tell you. After yesterday, I, me, my husband, our son, we have…
Read More
Often, to me, it feels like raising children can be likened to playing a long game. Solid parenting seems to be an exhausting process of doing “all the right things” and then having hope that we will see the fruits of our many labored years down the road. Sure, there are hints along the path that we’re heading in the right direction. Although, it will be decades before we really know if all of the encouragement, guiding, talking, showing, loving and repeating things ad nauseam (“hands are not for hitting!”)…
Read More
Dear Sully, I hope you get to experience what it’s like to have a true friend. I hope you get to experience what it’s like to fall in love and be loved in return unconditionally. I hope we get to attend your wedding someday and be those proud parents of the groom. I hope we get to stand in the hospital room and hold our beautiful grandbabies who have a huge heart and are extremely intelligent just like you. I hope you get to experience what it’s like to live…
Read More
Dad here. Big Dude is a perpetual three-year-old but many times we see him mature and show a different side of himself that makes Mom and me scratch our heads and ask rhetorically, “Where did that come from?” One such ritual is Big Dude’s insistence that I am fully dressed for the day from the moment we greet each other. Big Dude picks out my shirt. There are several that are his favorites. He chooses my trousers, shoes, and socks. If I am standing he will often push me gently…
Read More