When our son was diagnosed with autism a little over four years ago, I thought we would immediately start helping him. I assumed, so naively, that getting the diagnosis was all we needed to help him. I was wrong. For years we paved our own path. No one told us what to do. We couldn’t find any other children like our son. Our son had severe anxiety and rigidity. He self-injured. He had no understanding of safety or danger. He had chronic ear infections and extreme GI issues. He didn’t…
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Did you know that one sentence, one statement, one insult, one negative or positive comment can change the course of your life? I’ve learned that profoundly over the last seven years. My amazing kid is autistic and nonverbal. We are on our own path. We are paving our own way through this world. And many things that have been said to me over the years have changed that path. They’ve made me angry. They’ve made me smile. A few of them even leveled me so ferociously that I couldn’t get…
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Hoarding. It’s a very real behavior in our autism world. Take a peek at what our son hoards and the sheer amount. I have a feeling a lot of parents will relate, smile (and cry) at this one. Photos, DVD cases, DVD’s, VHS tapes, books, receipts, pieces of paper, etc. He gathers them all up and visually stims on them. And then once done, he chooses his favorite few, and the rest get stuffed behind dressers, entertainment centers and under beds and couches. Every Saturday I clean up his piles.…
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Food struggles. Some of the hardest battles we’ve had to date. I could tell you stories people. Tonight though, Super Cooper ate a whole plate of spaghetti and meatballs. And while he ate, Jamie and I reminisced about the days where he would throw chairs and tables (yes tables) over the sight of a blueberry, an apple or any new food. Up until Cooper was five years old he ate only four foods. The same four foods for every meal. Chicken nuggets, yogurt, Goldfish crackers and veggie straws. He also…
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When my son was diagnosed with autism, I remember this almost immediate pressure to become part of the club. To advocate. To take a stance for or against something. And this mama wanted nothing to do with any of it. My son was three years old. We were still trying to wrap our heads around autism and figure out what worked for him. We didn’t know what was wrong with the system. We were just surviving. Our lives were hard. Our days were long followed by even longer nights. And…
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On our summer vacation, I had an epiphany. Well, actually, I had a meltdown, then I had the epiphany. First the meltdown: In July, our family of four took the risk and went on a family vacation. It was so needed. Our past spring had been our toughest season yet since beginning the autism journey ten years ago. We were all worn out. To our relief our vacation was off to a great start. We had seen more peace, less meltdowns, than in the past five months. We were unpacking…
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A few nights ago I was talking to an acquaintance about Super Cooper. He was asking me questions about what it’s like to have a nonverbal child. He asked me if it is sad. He asked me if it was quiet. He asked me if Cooper has a desire to communicate. All AMAZING questions. They even brought me back to the day a speech therapist told me that we should prepare ourselves for the very possible fact that our beautiful son may never speak. I’ll admit, that sentence leveled me.…
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It’s hair cut day! Anyone that follows my page knows that this is a huge day in our world. (Next to potty training this is our biggest victory!) Haircuts and autism rarely mix. And after one too many really awful experiences trying to go to a salon, I decided to cut Cooper’s hair myself. The first year was awful. Kicking, hitting, screaming. But we stuck with it. And now, five years later, he is a pro. Take a watch and see how amazing my boy does at age seven. I…
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Last night when Cooper got home from school, he immediately ransacked his bag. He pulled everything out. Then grabbed his speech device and said…’I want greeting card.’ I had absolutely no idea what he was talking about. As he got more frustrated, I got more confused. Then this morning I get a text from his amazing therapist…’Did Cooper give dad the birthday card he made?!’ And then sent these photos. I seriously almost fell out of my chair. First, my kid is a genius and amazing. Second, he used his…
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I was heartbroken when my son was diagnosed with autism. You want to know why? Because of what I thought I knew about it. I had an idea in my head of what autism was. And boy was I wrong. There were a lot of things I didn’t know. The main thing was, I thought that people with autism couldn’t show affection. Or didn’t want to. I thought it was hard for everyone on the spectrum to make connections with others. The minute that the doctor told me that Carter…
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