Most day I could probably write a longer grocery list of why autism is so hard on us and Zachary, my nonverbal child. If you could make the best life for your child, you would. No questions ask. If I could ease his troubles and anxiety, I would in a heartbeat. Autism has significantly changed my life and perspectives on things. I had thought I was a grateful person beforehand, and maybe I was, but looking back it seems far more shallow. Here is my “grocery list” of 5 reasons…
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We have been blessed with literally dozens of amazing people since starting this special needs journey. They all love my son and want him to succeed as much as I do. But for today I want to say how thankful I am that Kayli came into our lives. Max was six months in to his Autism diagnosis, after years of trying to get answers. We were four months into ABA therapy. Our family was going through so many changes. We bought our first home, Max was transitioning to full day…
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I want to talk about regressions in our autism world. That word. Regression. A loss of skills. A set back. Starting over. If I didn’t live it I wouldn’t believe it. I know there is a clinical definition. Those never seem to sum it up for us though. A regression is like having the rug pulled out from under you. It’s two steps forward and three steps back. It’s working every single day on using a straw. Mastering it. And then one day, waking up, and not knowing how to…
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A glimpse inside our world…Most kids learn by observing others. They watch and learn. Or it’s instinctual. Kids just ‘pick’ up skills. We don’t have to teach them everything. We don’t have to think about every single possible skill that we do as humans and figure out a way to teach them. In our autism world, every single skill has to be taught. We’ve even had to teach Cooper how to learn. How to try. How to play. How to sit. How to care. Skills that are easy for most…
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Cooper’s 8th birthday is just around the corner. It’s always a bittersweet time for me. My boy is growing up. And yet, it’s a reminder of where he really is at cognitively, socially and emotionally. It’s a marker in time. A reminder. He will be eight. And yet, he won’t. A week or so ago, Cooper asked me for a party with ‘party, balloons, presents, cake, grandparents, Santa, Santa hat and Christmas tree.’ This is the first year he has asked me for a party. The years before have been…
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Because sometimes you just have to get out of the house! I’m setting a goal of getting out of the house. The isolation is getting to us. It’s been so many years. And honestly, I feel like it’s now or never. We are going to start venturing out weekly. Short trips. Non busy times. Zero expectations. If it goes badly we will just leave. Once a week minimum. Every parent I talk to with older autistic children tells me the same thing. Just start going. And keep trying. I want…
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Lately the stress of being home is wearing Jamie and I down. Our autistic son’s most challenging behaviors have really ramped up again. He is stimming on his Kindle, lining up objects, hoarding favorite items, tearing apart beds, destroying rooms, screaming, etc. T hese behaviors stem from anxiety. They also cause anxiety for everyone around him. I know this will pass. I know it will pass because it has before. But I also know that it will return. If we let our guard down for one second, leave doors unlocked,…
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While motherhood has certainly been my greatest adventure, the vulnerability in becoming a mom, and an autism mom, has been a substantial challenge for me. I found myself, for the first time in a long time, in need of help. A lot of it. This has never been something I’ll easily admit, ask for, or receive. Thankfully, I am surrounded by the most patient, kind and generous humans who constantly offer their support. Our friends and family and friends who are family, you open your homes to our curious five-year-old…
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My name is Stacy Hartmann. My husband Danny and I have been married for 8 years. We have a son named River, who is 5 and a daughter named Adeline, who is 2. We live near our families in Southern California where Danny works as a electrical engineer and I am a stay at home mom. River was diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome just a year ago. While our son was the center of our world, my husband and I always knew something about him was different. As a baby he…
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Before autism. Before Harbor. Before Sawyer. Before Cooper. I had a miscarriage. Jamie and I were newlyweds. We got pregnant the first month we tried. Which was immediately after we got married. We saw a heartbeat at 8 weeks. We told everyone. We announced on Facebook. We planned. We bought. We prepared. We were going to be parents. We talked about the parents we would be. And the child he or she would be. At 13 weeks there was no heartbeat. I was devastated. That word actually doesn’t even accurately…
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