Dear Moms of Autistic Children, This screenshot I took last year showed up in my memories today. It was in reply to a story I posted on my blog page of a video of my son. He was looping the same question over and over again in bed. I still remember how bad the message made me feel. Sometimes I receive messages like this, and they encompass a variety of tones. Some are kind, inquiring when Jesse achieved certain milestones or how we reached them. Those messages don’t bother me…
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Autism has been an ever changing experience in our life. It has had different meanings to us as it’s evolved through the different seasons of our lives. My daughter was diagnosed with Autism in January of 2012. She was just shy of three years old at the time. My oldest daughter had just turned thirteen years old, and my son had just turned seven years old. During those days Autism was overwhelming and hard. Not much information was out there about it during that time, especially in relation to having…
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I’m often asked how my son Cooper is doing. Typically it’s from a friend or family member. Someone we haven’t seen in a while. They ask the question entirely with love. I’ll tell them he is doing great. That he rides a horse named Winston. And plays baseball with his brother. And is starting seventh grade soon. I brag about how he is communicating in his own ways and typing words into YouTube and cracking my amazon password. He adores his brother Sawyer and likes to cause trouble with Harbor…
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‘Will his autism go away?’ That’s what the woman asked me. In front of 200 people. Honestly, you could have heard a pin drop as the heads in the room snapped from her to me. And I practiced the pause. I was presenting at a conference down south to a large group of folks who work with kids and adults like my son Cooper. The presentation I had just finished was called Finding Joy in the Secret World of Autism. For 90 minutes I shared my story. And my boy.…
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When my son Cooper was diagnosed with autism at age three they told me he was nonverbal. I didn’t even know that was a thing. At age five they told me he might never speak. I didn’t know that was a possibility. At age six the silence was deafening. So we dove into alternate forms of communication. Sign language. Spelling. An AAC Device. And I learned in a painful beautiful way that communication was the goal. Not words. It took time though. Time for my mind and heart to accept.…
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I was recently in Target without my kids wandering as moms do when they have an opportunity to take in the magic of the red circle. As I walked up to the register, I saw a Mom with two daughters, one in the cart sitting quietly and one becoming upset. As we both waited to check out, I could see the young girl getting more and more dysregulated. I watched as the Mom started to try and navigate the situation. Her daughter then began to yell. This wasn’t a tantrum…
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My son, I want to tell you how proud I am of you. When some people think of progress and success, they think of big, huge things. Like winning an award or crossing a finish line first. But as I stood behind you taking this photo, watching you sit calmly staring at the water, I see all of that and more. We just finished a family camping for three days. The weather was crummy and your baby sister went on a sleep strike. Everything we own is dirty. And you…
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I am totally THAT mom. Each year when I send my daughter off to her first day of school, it hurts. Like physically, in my gut, hurts. My breathing feels shallow. My heart seems to skip beats. My cheeks are hot and tingly. Waves of nausea pass through my belly like the ocean when a storm is near. Each year on that first day I feel sick with worry because I am here, and she is there. I know my daughter is not going out into the world alone when…
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Dear Special Needs Mommas, As the school year begins, I want to offer words of encouragement and motivation. Your role as advocates and supporters is crucial. Embrace the first weeks with optimism, knowing that you have the power to shape your child’s educational journey. Trust your instincts, collaborate with educators, and remember, you are never alone. From my experience as a former special education teacher and a caretaker to an adult with autism, these are my “go to” tips for you to survive the first week of school. You will…
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My son Logan has been in public school since the beginning of his autism diagnosis. Something I wasn’t always sure of doing with a special needs child. Because the truth is that sending your nonverbal child to public school is terrifying. I’ve read the stories. I’ve seen the news. I feared for sending my beautiful boy to a place that may not protect him. It weighed so heavily on me. I was so afraid he wouldn’t be understood. That they wouldn’t be compassionate or patient with him. That they wouldn’t…
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