Posts by Kate Swenson
Beyond Words: Autism and Friendship
My son Cooper is 12 years old. He said his first word at age 8. It was mom. Only he said it slowly, each letter drawn out as if he was plucking them down from the sky. M. AW. M. It was the most beautiful word I had ever heard. Today he has 20 or so words. Mom. Dad. Cooper. Sawyer. Harbor. Sister. Help. More. Eat. Juice. Water. Milk. Chicken. He doesn’t say them unprompted very often. And when he does say them most people can’t understand them. But that’s…
Read MoreNavigating the Education System with a Nonverbal Autistic Child
‘I feel like a fraud.’ That’s how I started my presentation to a wonderful group of teachers and staff today. ‘I feel like a fraud because I have no idea where my son fits into the world of education. And I’m scared to say it might be nowhere.’ My name is Kate and I have four children. They are 12, 10, 4, and 2. My oldest has a diagnosis of severe, nonverbal, level 3 autism. His name is Cooper. Nothing with him is typical. It’s always been a battle to…
Read MoreA Night of Miracles and Being “Just a Mom”
Last night I was just a mom. That reads funny, I know. I mean, I have four kids. I’m always ‘just’ a mom. I pack lunches and wash blankets. I kiss owies and scrub grass stains out of baseball pants. I give baths and hold hands and know all the passwords and how to fix the wifi when it stops working. With my oldest, Cooper, it’s a bit different. At age three he was diagnosed with severe nonverbal autism. And well, the game changed a bit. Suddenly I became more…
Read MoreFrom Darkness to Light: Reflecting on Our Autism Journey and Celebrating Progress
We used to not be able to have lamps in our home. That sentence right there. That’s the one that people always comment on when I say it during presentations. Then they chuckle when I follow it up with how for weeks we had to eat with headlamps on. In the dark. At our kitchen table. I’m sharing this here because my son Cooper just had one of his best weekends ever. And I spent a little time last night looking at old photos and remembering the beginning of our…
Read MoreThe Beauty of a Single Word
I decided to take a much needed nap yesterday while my two youngest napped. You know that old saying…sleep when the baby sleeps? Well those babies are 2 and 4 and they are double trouble. Between them and the new puppy and early morning wake ups…I’m exhausted. Anyhow, I slept for 2 glorious hours. And I woke up to the most beautiful sound. One I had never heard before. One I had only dreamed about. ‘M-O-M?’ (Said slow. Each syllable pronounced as if he had to think about each one…
Read MoreAutism Victories: The Joy of the Little Things
Two weeks ago my autistic son went to his younger brother’s baseball game for the first time. He stayed 15 minutes. A few nights after that he went for the whole two hour game. A few nights after that we brought our youngest daughter with us. And then most recently, Spider-Man (our 4 year old) came too. Which, if you add it all up, means all six of us were at a baseball game together. It was not effortless. Not by any means. It was work. I don’t think me…
Read MoreAm I Brave Enough?
I just left the grocery store. I only had a few things today so opted for the self checkout today. While I scanned my items, I became aware of two young men next to me. I would say they were both in their 20’s. It dawned on me rather quickly that one was helping the other shop for groceries. He was helping him scan each item, slow and meticulously. Talking him through he step. The gentleman being helped was very much enjoying himself. He was laughing and making very happy…
Read MoreTo My Sweet Boy
My sweet boy, It’s your old mom here. I have something I want to tell you. Something I want you to know. Years ago, during our hardest days, I made a promise to you Cooper. You didn’t know it. I made it late at night. One of those desperate internal conversations that happen at 3 AM in a scared mother’s mind. We were two years into your nonverbal autism diagnosis although I was nowhere near an expert. We had just said goodbye to kindergarten. It wasn’t working and you needed…
Read MoreA Simple Card, an Unforgettable Gift: The Impact of Inclusion and Support
There is a memory I often share about Mother’s Day. In fact I think it’s even in my book. It impacted me so deeply. So much so that I’m still talking about it 10 years later. My son Cooper is the one who first made me a mom. Today he is 12 years old. He has a diagnosis of severe nonverbal autism. I like to tell the moms and dads of newly diagnosed children that it takes time. Every part. Acceptance. Understanding. Advocacy. It all takes time. Ten years ago,…
Read MoreTwo Brothers Side-By-Side
I’m raising two boys side-by-side. There is barely two years between them. When I found out I was pregnant with my second son all those years ago…I had plans. Big ones. Visions. Expectations. Best friends. Teammates. When the oldest was diagnosed with severe nonverbal autism it all changed. Ever so slightly at first. Than greatly over time. They didn’t play together. They didn’t even acknowledge each other. But time…it has a way of healing and growing. Understanding comes. Loyalty. Love. Devotion. And advocacy. Tonight I watched the one with no…
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