Posts by Kate Swenson
To the Keeper of My Son’s Traditions
To my son’s future caregiver… My son is 14 years old. When he was three he was diagnosed with severe nonverbal autism. We had no idea what the future held. And honestly, we weren’t told much good. When he was 8, I made the decision to walk away from the negativity. The sad predictions. And the people who didn’t believe in him. Or see his strengths. It was the best decision I’ve ever made. His favorite thing to do is to decorate for Christmas. He will help for a bit.…
Read MoreThe Fears We Share as Parents of Kids with Disabilities
What keeps you up at night? That was the question asked during a presentation I was giving to the amazing folks who work with children and adults like my son. I fumbled a bit through my answer because I don’t like to speak of those things. I said keeping my son safe from the dangers of the world. As he gets older, bigger and bolder, I find it more worrisome. And who will care for him after I’m gone. Or if something happened to me and my husband now. I…
Read MoreThank You: Why Family Restrooms Matter to Families Like Mine
My message to establishments that have family restrooms. THANK YOU. Before I had a child with a disability, I was oblivious to a lot of things. I foolishly assumed that all kids went to restaurants, and used public restrooms and even transitioned from riding in a cart to walking. I didn’t know that some children are deathly afraid of automatic flushing toilets and hand dryers. I didn’t know that some parents are unable to go into gas stations or even go through drive thrus. But the biggest thing that I…
Read MoreUnexpected Moments: The Magic of My Son’s Christmas Spirit
I’ve learned as I’ve aged that the biggest, most memorable moments of our lives, are often the ones we least expect. Of course a wedding, the birth of our babies, an anniversary, are the best. But other ones sneak in. When you least expect them. A solo car ride with your son. A walk with your aging parent. Staying up way too late drinking wine with your husband. Coffee with a friend. Or when your first born takes it upon himself to decorate for Christmas. Now, I know that may…
Read MoreThe Beauty of Sawyer’s Soul
Yesterday, I drove my middle son Sawyer to school. He typically rides the bus but he wanted to donate a handful of toys to the toy drive his school was holding so I drove him. ‘The toys go to Children’s Hospital mom.’ He was adamant about bringing presents. As we drove he asked me a zillion questions. As a mom, I’ve learned that some of the best conversations happen in the car. After tell me that he has a project due this week and about something he saw on YouTube,…
Read MoreWhy Positive Moments Matter in Our Autism Journey
When I share our autism story with professionals…teachers, therapists, doctors, nurses, I always say this sentence: Something you have said to a parent about their child, positive or negative, runs through their head on repeat. It’s true. Many have hardened me. Some have lightened the load. We have been told so many things. Your son will never talk, make a friend, or ride a bike. If your son doesn’t have any words by age four than game over. Your son is absolutely amazing! And then this one. One of my…
Read MoreFacing Forever: The Hardest Talks About Our Son’s Future
Parents of kids with disabilities… What is the most difficult, yet important conversation you’ve had around your child’s needs? Maybe it was around medications. Or the decision to have more children. Or to let go of education and focus on daily living skills. For my husband and I, it was around forever. It was grappling with the thought that our son will live on this earth without us. It took us years to be able to sit down and rationally speak about it. In the beginning, I’d bring it up.…
Read MoreFeet Bigger Than Mine: A Mother’s Journey with Autism
I don’t talk about our challenges associated with autism all that much any more. Some followers assume that life is easier now. Or our son is less autistic. Neither of those things are true. Cooper is still very much significantly affected. But he is also wonderfully supported. We, his family, our friends, his team, we know how to support him. And because of that…he is thriving. We all settled in as I like to say. I’m not afraid to share either. It’s not that. I have my reasons. Ones that…
Read MoreCelebrating Life with My Autistic Son
When your child is diagnosed with autism, at whatever age, you will inevitably seek out as much information as you can about the disorder. Autism Spectrum Disorder. You will read blogs, buy books, watch television shows, join groups, and talk to experts, friends, and family. You want to know everything you can. I will tell you in the beginning, what I saw in books didn’t match my son. What I saw online didn’t either. And the challenges that were supposedly coming our way….everyone was so quick to share those. What…
Read MoreEmbracing the Silence: A Mother’s Connection and Growth with Her Autistic Son
My sweet boy,We just got back from a car ride. We do that sometimes. You and me. We used to ride around to help you calm down. A much needed break for both of us to reset.Now we drive around and hunt for trains.Not a lot has changed over the years except now you are thirteen. And you can buckle your own seatbelt. A skill we worked on for years. A skill that you are incredibly proud of.We still ride mostly in silence. When you were three the experts told…
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