Autism: From ‘Never’ to ‘Possible’

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When my son was diagnosed with autism nine years ago, I began to think in nevers.

Not right away. But more over time.

Now as a typically very positive person, it felt strange. It felt unlike me.

But, that’s how the people around us spoke about autism.

Your son will never talk. He will never ride a bike. He will never make a friend.
I could go on an on.

He will never have a normal life. He will never live independently.

Never, never, never.

With each evaluation for services, benefits and placements, the nevers stacked up.
Talk about sad. That way of thinking messed me up big time. And I’m pretty sure it still happens a lot today with newly diagnosed children.
I no longer think that way. Now I look at all the things he can do. And may do. And hopefully will do. And if something does end up being a never, well, that’s ok too. He has limits and acknowledging those are healthy.
But the possibilities far outweigh the nevers.

Yesterday he went to the airport to practice flying on an airplane.

He rode a tram. He went through security. He went on an escalator. He waited for what felt like years during a lightning delay. He boarded the plane he buckled his seatbelt.

I never thought it was possible. Boy did he prove me wrong.

Switch your way of thinking. It will change everything.
PS. Look at those smiling eyes!
Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook.
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Kate Swenson

Kate Swenson lives in Minnesota with her husband Jamie, and four children, Cooper, Sawyer, Harbor and Wynnie. Kate launched Finding Cooper's Voice from her couch while her now 11-year-old son Cooper was being diagnosed with autism. Back then it was a place to write. Today it is a living, thriving community of people who want to not only advocate for autism, but also make the world a better place for individuals with disabilities and their families. Her first book, Forever Boy, will be released, April 5, 2022.

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