A Brother. An Advocate. A Helper.

coopands storefeat

Recently we ventured to the store for a few things. Eggs. Milk. Nerf gun bullets. And 2 pieces of paper. The essentials. Obviously.

Outings as a family are still relatively new for us. And while they are far from perfect, they are real.

See, we have a kid who is just learning about waiting and buying and walking and all the parts of the world.

While our son Cooper is making amazing progress at stores and by amazing, I mean huge leaps and bounds…so much of it is still hard for him.

In fact, after, I felt a bit like I’d ran a marathon while going two rounds. And I didn’t win. But I did finish.

Our struggles were plentiful.

Not to mention the sweet cashier who was brand new and didn’t know how to work the register, the man in front of us whose debit card didn’t work, the manager who saw a coachable moment, and the dozens of eyes burning holes in our back as we helped our son off the floor.

There were whispers. Lots of them. I saw a head shake. A glare. A look of pity. I saw judgement.

And that’s ok. People are human. But so are we. And so is Cooper.

He did his best. He tried his hardest. And after, as we talked through his struggles, he took deep breaths, nonverbally telling me he will do better next time.

And I believe him. He will. Because he’s figuring out a world that doesn’t make sense to him. This is our normal. This is his autism. This is our world.

But something extraordinary happened too. During his hard, I watched his younger brother round the corner, see Cooper and I, and almost run to him and immediately drop to his knees.

‘Buddy, I’m here. How can I help?’

A saying I use daily. A hundred times. How can I help? What a powerful question.

This kid. A brother. An advocate. A helper.

He amazed me today.

He saw hard and walked into it with one purpose…to help his brother. He had his shield on today, the one all special needs parents have to deflect the bad from our kids. It never crossed my mind that the siblings get one too.

I’ve never been so proud of him.

These two. Together they are going to change the world. I just know it.

Thank you for being here with us and learning alongside this boy.
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Kate Swenson

Kate Swenson lives in Minnesota with her husband Jamie, and four children, Cooper, Sawyer, Harbor and Wynnie. Kate launched Finding Cooper's Voice from her couch while her now 11-year-old son Cooper was being diagnosed with autism. Back then it was a place to write. Today it is a living, thriving community of people who want to not only advocate for autism, but also make the world a better place for individuals with disabilities and their families. Her first book, Forever Boy, will be released, April 5, 2022.

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