October 22, 2023
Real Family Moments
I think that social media has led us to believe that a lot of families are perfect.
I know I follow a few pages that make me feel that way. And sometimes it hurts me heart.
My family isn’t perfect. We aren’t even close.
We are loud and messy and probably even a little bit annoying. (I say that with the love of a mother.)
There are six of us. Two adults. Four little people. And we smile and pose for a photo that will be shared on Facebook. Often with no context behind it.
So, this time I will share. I will be real with you.
Today we rode a Pumpkin Train. And it was very hard.
Our oldest is autistic. He struggles to wait and sit and understand how to be present in this complicated world.
But he loves trains. And he loves going. So we try.
Every year…we try. And we will continue to do so.
I’ve noticed that as we near teenage-hood that the kids around us are staying the same age. Two and three years older. And we are aging.
We aren’t little anymore. And we don’t blend in. People stare a lot. They whisper too. Maybe they think we don’t notice.
Maybe they are being kind and wondering how they can help. I don’t know I guess. I just know it stings.
But what has changed is the people in our life.
Our friend Rachel who helped us every step of the way. She carried our toddler on her shoulders and blocked a path when Cooper sat on the sidewalk.
Volunteers. One was a grandma with a grandson similar to Cooper and she recognized my plea for accommodation. She helped immediately. A man with a yellow vest and a walkie-talkie who helped us onto the train quickly.
My ten year old. Cooper’s brother. Who never flinches during challenging behavior. He stands tall and fearless in the face of a watching crowd. I know someday it may be different. He’s growing up too. But today, and every day before today, he has stood by his brother. And I don’t know if I will ever truly be able to thank him for that.
We did it friends. We rode the train. And there were really good parts and challenging parts. There were moments where I wanted to cry and others where I beamed with pride at the progress our family has made.
Big swings of emotion I tell you. Highs and lows. Good and bad. Hard and easy.
This life isn’t for the faint of heart. This I know to be true.
Cooper high fived each of us at the end of the train ride. He was proud of his success. That’s what I’m trying to focus on.
Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook.
