September 17, 2023
Unlocking the World of My Nonspeaking Son
Before I had my son Cooper, I knew nothing of autism. Not really.
And I can say with absolute certainty that I knew nothing about nonspeakers or nonverbal individuals.
I’m sure I had ideas. And I’m sure they were wrong.
My son is considered nonverbal on paper. And he has so much to tell us.
At 12 years old he has 20 or so words. He has some sign language. He loves sounds and gestures. He can spell and read and type when he chooses too. He uses a speech device too. He gets his point across better than most speaking individuals.
All of this is good. Amazing really. It’s progress. And hard work and determination. It’s taken years. And I know there is so much more to come. I feel it in my heart.
But the thing is he mostly uses communication for things like requesting lunch and water and juice. He will tell me he has to go to the bathroom. Or that he wants his shoes. And Christmas. He loves to share about Christmas.
I am thankful for all of this. It’s been life changing.
But lately, I find myself wondering more about his hopes and dreams. He’s going to be 13 soon. He has friends. He rides a bus to 7th grade. He’s growing up.
I want to chat. I want to ask. I want to argue. I want more…for him.
I just got back from a caregiver’s retreat. I was gone for 2 nights. It felt like a split second to me. Probably a lifetime to him.
When I walked up the driveway towards Cooper he immediately made the train sound and tapped his chest and then pointed to me.
That means…Lake Superior Railroad Museum with mom.
Then he grabbed his speech device and tapped on two buttons. The voice said…
‘Target Leap Frog DVD.’
That means he wants to go to Target to buy a Leapfrog DVD.
I couldn’t believe it.
Then the amazing one…
He typed 5 letters on the keyboard. The voice said…
‘Jerrys.’
I had no idea what that meant. I asked for more.
One button more.
‘Cookie.’
Still no idea.
Then he pointed to the plastic bag sitting next to us. The bag that his brother just brought home.
It was a bag for Jerry’s Grocery Store.
He was asking me to go to the Grocery Store. He’s never done that before.
Communication.
What a beautiful gift it is. A glimpse inside a beautiful mind.
Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook.
