June 11, 2023
Beyond Words: Autism and Friendship
My son Cooper is 12 years old.
He said his first word at age 8. It was mom.
Only he said it slowly, each letter drawn out as if he was plucking them down from the sky.
M. AW. M. It was the most beautiful word I had ever heard.
Today he has 20 or so words.
Mom. Dad. Cooper. Sawyer. Harbor. Sister. Help. More. Eat. Juice. Water. Milk. Chicken.
He doesn’t say them unprompted very often. And when he does say them most people can’t understand them. But that’s okay.
Because he tries harder than any human I have ever met to do something that you and I take for granted.
People ask me why all the time.
The simple answer is autism. Apraxia of speech. Anxiety. The complicated answer is…I don’t know.
I don’t know and I might never know.
But I’ve learned to listen with more than my ears.
A movement. A gesture. A sound. A look. It’s all communication.
This morning I gave him a glass of milk and walked back to the kitchen. I was in my own head thinking about dishes and ordering baseball photos when I heard…
‘M-AW-M.’
He repeated it a dozen or so times before I looked up at him.
He smiled and grandly signed…thank you…with his right hand.
See he can’t say those words. Thank you. His mouth can’t make those sounds. But his hands can.
‘You’re welcome buddy.’
When he communicates I know it’s really important to him because it is so hard for him to do so.
And this photo. This is Cooper on the last day of school with his best friend Peyton.
Her mom text it to me.
I can’t stop looking at it.
I don’t know if he’s ever spoken to her. Or if she can understand him. But she doesn’t seem to mind much.
I am so thankful for this girl.
She is his friend.
He calls her ‘P.’
Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook.
