April 16, 2023
Inside My Nonspeaking Son’s World: Dreams, Plans, and Hope
I used to pray for a glimpse inside my nonspeaking son’s world.
Simple things…
Why does he love trains so much?
What’s his favorite color?
Why will he eat apple sauce out of a cup but not a pouch?
But big things too…
Is he happy?
What does he want to be when he grows up?
What is he afraid of?
Does he know how loved he is?
For years, I had no idea. I was walking blind as a mother.
Today, my sweet boy is 12 years old. He’s almost as tall as me. And I love to wear his shoes because they are way cooler than mine.
He loves holding my hand. Unless he’s in a hurry. Then I don’t move quite fast enough.
He said his first word at age 8.
‘MMM-AW-MMM.’ (Mom) Three long drawn out sounds. Like he was plucking each one out of a cloud above his head.
I was told when he was four that he would most likely never talk. That I should prepare for a life without words.
And I did. I poured my energy into sign language, spelling, typing, pointing, gestures, and a speech device.
Anything that would help him communicate.
Today he has 25 or so words. He is never quiet. Unless we are in the car. Those are the moments where the silence is deafening.
But everywhere else he is noisy.
A gasp at a bug.
An animated wave as dad pulls into the driveway.
A song on an iPad.
A dramatic point as he tattles on his siblings.
His hands are always dancing.
He twirls as he walks.
In my heart I am confident of his happiness. he shows me daily.
This is our calendar. It used to be filled with hockey games and baseball practices. Meetings, conferences, and travel.
Now it is Coopers.
It’s a glimpse inside of his world.
These are his dreams. His plans. His hopes. Our goals.
He wants to go on a train ride with mom.
He want to visit the Blue Mountain Quarry and see his favorite animated train, Renais.
He wants to take the Amtrak to Chicago and then to Michigan to visit a model train store.
And of course, take a train ride with his animated friends from Madagascar to the circus.
He has big plans. And he shares them with me by showing me clips and glimpses into his world.
All those years ago, I prayed for words. Now I know I was praying for this.
This right here.
Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook.
