April 6, 2023
Parenting a Child with A Disability: Challenges and Joy
Some days, I can’t help but watch. Watch everyone else and envy how easy things seem to be for them.
Deep down I know that everyone has their own struggles, but it’s hard to shake the feeling that our day-to-day life is so much more complicated.
At school drop-off I watch as other kids jump out of their cars and walk confidently into the building, while we have to park and walk our son directly to his para.
And at pickup, I see kids my son’s age walking home or to their parents’ cars, while we have to navigate the chaos of trying to get our son safely into the car.
Even simple tasks like shopping become exhausting events for us. I see the cute, little families strolling through the store, and it’s hard not to feel a pang of envy. For us, it takes a lot of preparation and just to get into and through the building.
Today, I took my son to the doctor, and I couldn’t help but wonder how simple yearly check-ups go for everyone else. With autism, small concerns become big concerns, and every appointment feels like a major event.
We have to make appointments with specialists just in case, and even routine measurements like height and weight require a lot of effort. Me right in their helping him hold still to get the proper numbers.
He gets his eyes scanned because he can’t do the normal eye test. And, it takes multiple people to administer even one shot.
He and I were stuck in a small room as the doctor and nurse came and went for an hour, trying to be patient and calm. It feels the same as when he was a toddler.
It’s exhausting.
Afterward we went to Starbucks for a cake pop for my boy who really did his best. As we waited, coming down from the appointment, I felt tears prick at the corners of my eyes.
It’s just a check-up, just another day in the life of a special needs parent. But the realization that nothing is simple hits hard, and it can be overwhelming.
But in the midst of all the struggles, there are also moments of joy and triumph. Seeing our son overcome a challenge or achieve a milestone makes all the hard work worth it.
And as difficult as it can be, we know that we’re not alone and that many have it much harder than us.
There’s a whole community of special needs parents out there, fighting battles and celebrating victories. Together, we can keep going, one step at a time.
