Holidays are Hard for a Family Like Ours
I want to acknowledge how hard holidays like this one can be on a family with a member who has a disability.
It’s important that we talk about it. Share what we need. Let the world know that we are trying but so often we just can’t.
We try. We may fail.
We don’t try. We feel left out. Sad.
It’s hard.
If we do go to the bbq, beach or party, we are usually near but far.
We wander the perimeter.
We sit in the car.
We hide in a bedroom.
We watch from a distance.
Near but far. Seeing but not being a part of.
For years, even sometimes today, I wished for someone just to wander with me and my son. Walk with us.
Yesterday my son had his first ever field trip. It was wonderful and I am so proud of him and thankful we went.
But I will say, he never interacted with another child. While the other 125 kids played laser tag, mini golfed, and spent money in the arcade, my husband and I jumped with him in the trampoline and climbed in the play structure.
It was wonderful for us. No sadness at all. Only joy.
But, near but far. In the same building. Not in any way part of the event.
I used to say we were never excluded but not really included either. I feel that still. Often.
And while I know it is what it is, and can’t be changed, I just want to acknowledge it. Talk about it.
Holidays like this weekend are hard on our families.
The subtle differences will scream at us. Often we will choose to stay home where it’s safe. Or we will venture out, holding our breath.
So, give us grace. Acknowledge us.
Sit with with. Walk with us. Ask how you can help. Know that we are trying so hard to fit into your world.
Find us. Bring us a plate of food. Maybe even a drink. Include us in the photos.
The little things.
Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. Follow us on Facebook, Instagram, and join our supporter page, Coop’s Troops, for an amazing community full of support and understanding.
