This too Shall Pass

This too shall pass.

There is a saying that is said at one time or another to every parent.

This too shall pass.

I remember being told those words as I held each of my newborns, exhausted from cluster feeding and lack of sleep.

Again during the never ending messes that kids make. During potty training woes and tantrums over blue cups and the wrong shoes.

And I guess in most cases it’s true right? The hard moments do pass. Usually.

Babies start sleeping. Messes stop. Little humans learn to communicate. Kids get more independent. They grow up. Too fast really.

Little kid problems evolve into big kid problems. Which are a whole new set of worries.

But what if it doesn’t pass? Because in some instances, they don’t.

Some, stay frozen in time.

I read posts daily from special needs moms, exhausted. Some with adult children. Some with teens. Some with newly diagnosed toddlers.

Their concerns, worries, frustrations and fears poured out into a Facebook post. The responses from well meaning folks…this too shall pass. As if they have a crystal ball.

I’ve been there. I am there. I’ve read those words and seen red, angry at the lack of understanding.

Some days I want to scream…but what if it doesn’t?!

But I don’t. Because then I’m being negative. Or giving up hope. Or parenting wrong. When in reality, I’m being real.

Moms. Dads. Caregivers. Grandparents. People who walk the same path as me. Some parts may not pass. I think it’s important to acknowledge that. And not in a perceived negative way. But in a…’this is my life and I want to talk about it’ kinda way.

Some kids turn into adults and don’t learn to sleep or eat or talk. Or how to cross the street safely. Or put on their shoes. I know this.

But you will be okay. You will be okay because you will figure it out. Because you are an amazing parent.

And your child, whether 13 or 22 or 35, is amazing too.

You will figure it all out together.

There is another saying. One that I love more.

Something like it’s not about waiting for the storm to pass, but instead learning to dance in the rain.

Cheesy? Maybe. But, in my world, we dance every single night to songs about spiders and monkeys jumping on the bed.

We have some rain over here. Anxiety and sleep struggles. Safety concerns and worries. But we have a lot of sunshine too. More sunshine then rain in reality. Even days where it rains and shines.

And we are amazing dancers. We twirl and laugh, everywhere and anywhere. And we don’t focus on the rain really.

Because, well, dwelling on the things that may not pass are not worth it. Instead, focus on the good.

Keep dancing friends. You’ll make it through.

Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. Follow us on Facebook, Instagram, and join our supporter page, Coop’s Troops, for an amazing community full of support and understanding.