A Love Note to My Wife

Autism is hard!

Hard for the diagnosed individual, the siblings, the family and on a marriage.

When we said “I do” we never expected to embark on an autism journey and we definitely didn’t envision the vows “in sickness and in health” would apply to our unborn child.

Autism has challenged our marriage in ways we could never imagine and it has enriched our marriage in ways nothing else could. 

I could share some of the many autism moments, experiences, pitfalls, disappointments, lessons, achievements, challenges, and wins that got us to the place we are today but if your child has autism you have enough of those already.

Instead I chose to share how my wife and our marriage helps me survive our life with autism.

I realize that every autism parent is not married but this is MY reality. 

To my Wife: 

You are my safest place in all the universe.

Sometimes I feel like a cellphone in low battery mode and you recharge my battery so I can go on and stay connected in our life.

You are my confessional.

I share my inner most thoughts and feelings about my autism struggles and you forgive me but more importantly you help me forgive myself and atone for my sins. After, I feel whole and ready to move forward. 

You are my anchor and often drop down by way of voice, text, and embrace to let me know you are by my side to stay no matter what.

In your presence after a long and hard autism day, I feel like a beach sunset. Struggling to float above the water  while also slowly fading to rest and do it again tomorrow.

It’s NEVER easy, most days it’s ALWAYS hard but together we prevail for him, for our family and for our marriage. 

Loving you forever in our reality of “in sickness and in health”,

Me

XO

Written by, Jeanine Gordon

Jeanine Gordon is an oncology nurse who lives in New York City.  Her and her wife Ruthy have a 5 year son with autism named Grayson and a 19 year old son in college named Nicolas.  

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Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook, subscribe for exclusive videos, and subscribe to our newsletter.

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Kate Swenson

Kate Swenson lives in Minnesota with her husband Jamie, and four children, Cooper, Sawyer, Harbor and Wynnie. Kate launched Finding Cooper's Voice from her couch while her now 11-year-old son Cooper was being diagnosed with autism. Back then it was a place to write. Today it is a living, thriving community of people who want to not only advocate for autism, but also make the world a better place for individuals with disabilities and their families. Her first book, Forever Boy, will be released, April 5, 2022.

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