Progress Over Perfection

Progress over Perfection.

That’s a phrase I think about a lot. In the most challenging years of our son’s life, post autism diagnosis, it felt like we were frozen in time.

Or moving backwards even. But never forward.

Our son was in pain, but we didn’t know why or what. He didn’t sleep or communicate. He hurt himself and us. He rarely smiled.

For years it seemed like he wasn’t made for this big, confusing world. And to top it off, the world didn’t seem to want him either.

But we didn’t give up on him. And we refused to let the world give up on him.

We didn’t demand perfection, but we did demand progress.

We just left the doctor. I sat in awe as I watched my son count to 30 with his fingers while the nurse took his pulse. He didn’t scream when she touched his skin. He didn’t run when she took his temperature.

He stood on the scale and for his height.

He smiled when the doctor asked where his heart was, proudly pointing to his chest. And high fiving me after when she told him good job.

The appointment was not perfect by anyone’s standards. There were struggles…trust me.

Very little is easy for him. But his progress…I am shocked. I am proud.

And no, there is no magic pill to fix his hard. There is no snapping fingers or even logic at times.

We just refused to give up on him. And we refused to let him give up on himself. We practice everything. We try. We go. We do. We fail. We learn. We fall down. We get up. We cry. We cheer.

I know it sounds exhausting. And it is most of the time. And not just for us, for him too.

But he deserves to be in this world too. To experience the joy and the wonder that is out there.

Progress over perfection folks.

Crawl if you have too. But never stop moving.

Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook, subscribe for exclusive videos, and subscribe to our newsletter.

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Kate Swenson

Kate Swenson lives in Minnesota with her husband Jamie, and four children, Cooper, Sawyer, Harbor and Wynnie. Kate launched Finding Cooper's Voice from her couch while her now 11-year-old son Cooper was being diagnosed with autism. Back then it was a place to write. Today it is a living, thriving community of people who want to not only advocate for autism, but also make the world a better place for individuals with disabilities and their families. Her first book, Forever Boy, will be released, April 5, 2022.

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