Waiting for the Magic
Our Christmas in photos…
Cooper is a concrete thinker. He sees, therefore it is. Abstract thoughts are harder for him to grasp and understand. Like time. Danger. Things you can’t see or feel. Magic.
He’s also a yes man.
So anything you ask him…he will ultimately say yes.
And while many times the correct answer is yes…often it’s not.
Like when I ask him and his younger brothers incriminating questions.
‘Did you make this mess Cooper?’
The answer is always yes. Even when I know for a certain that his younger brothers are the culprits.
It’s something we work on daily.
At age ten he learned how to shake his head no. Well, it’s more of his whole body. And it is the cutest thing. So if something is really no, like really, really no, he will let us know.
‘Do you want to eat broccoli?’ ‘Do you want a haircut?’ ‘Do you want brother to sleep in his own room tonight?’
Those are a definite no.
See, when you have to see it to believe it and no is yes, communication can be a challenge.
But last night, I felt tears spring to my eyes after a trying conversation.
He was arguing with me about opening the mail.
Oh, that’s another thing. Nonverbal does not mean quiet. Or unable to communicate.
Nonverbal means persuasive. And smart. And resourceful. He’s learned how to get his points across without words.
He was nonverbally letting me know that he was owed two pieces of mail to open. And he was right. But I was busy cooking dinner and feeding a baby and mail couldn’t be opened at that second. He had to wait.
My answer didn’t suffice.
So I stepped in the pantry with my phone and then told him that I just spoke with Santa Clause.
Cooper gasped. He immediately picked up my phone to see if the big guy was still available. He wasn’t.
I relayed my pretend conversation to him.
‘Santa told me that he is watching you extra close this year and he needs you to be a good boy.’
‘Santa is watching you right now Cooper.’
And the little boy who didn’t understand Santa last year, ran to the window to study the night sky.
For five minutes he looked. Then he turned back to me, smiled, and sat down and waited calmly for the next 30 minutes while we ate dinner.
He must have seen the old guy up in the sky because he most definitely understood.
At ten years old, many kids are nearing the age where the magic is fading. Almost teenagers. But we are just starting.
We are lucky. I felt that more than ever last night.
Magic sometimes takes time. A lot of great things are like that.
Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook, subscribe for exclusive videos, and subscribe to our newsletter.
