2020 Thanksgiving…An Autism Moms dream
Thanksgiving used to be my favorite holiday. I have lots of cousins (from my mom’s side)and that was the day we all got together when I was younger and even as I became an adult.
It was the one day of the year that I knew I could go “home” and be brought back to childhood. In 2012, my grandmother celebrated her last Thanksgiving and it was never the same for me.
After my son Caleb was born I wanted to recreate those family holiday memories for him. We moved to Florida to be close to family so he could experience the same with his cousins here (from my Dad’s side) that were close to his age.
The first thanksgiving we were here was around the time we found out that Autism was a real possibility but aside from that Caleb was already showing signs of overstimulation, aggression and not really being social. All of this meant mama, once again, didn’t get to enjoy Thanksgiving.
The following year was a little better, we knew what we were dealing with. Family was aware and very supportive but the anxiety was still there.
Family gatherings can be so hard with autism. Caleb loves his family but gets overstimulated. He doesn’t eat anything, he doesn’t want to sit still at the table and there’s lots of people around, lots of smells and sounds that are not part of his normal.
As a result, I barely get to eat, I never get to sit, I spend most of the time chasing, navigating, hovering and more importantly not enjoying family time. We’re usually the first to leave, rushing to get home…rushing back to our normal.
It sounds awful to say in a time when people would kill to be with family (some are literally risking it all to be with family) but I’m glad we got to stay home. I got to sit down and eat. There was no hovering, no anxiety, no reminders that Thanksgiving may never be the same.
This Thanksgiving I’m thankful that there was no real Thanksgiving. We can try again in 2021 but Caleb had a great day and for the first time in 8 years, I enjoyed Thanksgiving.
Written by, Tiffany Hutchinson
My name is Tiffany and I am a single mama to 5 year old son Caleb Ashton who is awesomely autistic. We live in Tampa, Florida and we share our journey on our blog https://amamabearandhercub.com with the hope to inspire and encourage other families in the African American community, where autism still doesn’t get spoken about as often as it should. You can follow me on Instagram at A Mama Bear And Her Cub and on YouTube.
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