When You Don’t Feel Like Yourself
Last week I posted a selfie of my son Tommy and I happily snuggling up on the sofa on Facebook and received some lovely comments and messages.
Some of my followers on my blog, Stories About Autism, mentioned how happy I looked, how content, as if a weight had been lifted off my shoulders.
In fact it couldn’t be further from the truth. Whilst yes, in that moment I was definitely happy, the last few months have been increasingly tough, and I just haven’t felt myself.
I thought that once school started again, and that I had some rest, and free time again, that I’d find that spark. That once I started doing all of the things that usually help me when I feel a bit down, those thoughts and feelings would change. But they haven’t.
I feel incredibly flat, unable to get excited about anything. Tired, empty, numb, and generally uninterested in socialising.
I’ve had periods over the last 7-8 years where I’ve struggled with my mental health. Divorce, career problems, financial issues, isolation, and the challenges of being a full time carer to my boys Tommy and Jude, have all played a part, and I’ve spoken about them before.
This time something feels different. There’s a lot going on right now, in all areas of my life, and it’s become a lot to carry. And I guess I’m finding it hard to keep it together.
Over the last couple of weeks I’ve been talking this through with friends, and this week I sought some professional help. Doing it alone isn’t working, so it’s time to do something about it. Hopefully, over the coming weeks and months, that help will start to make a difference.
Why am I telling you all of this?
Well firstly, this blog has always been 100% honest. Pretending everything’s ok when it’s not, just doesn’t feel right. So many of us smile and get on with everything, never letting people know how we’re really feeling.
Secondly, we just had #WorldMentalHealthDay I know there’ll be some of you out there reading who are feeling a similar way, and who haven’t done anything about it yet. Who haven’t spoken to a friend, who haven’t reached out and told them how you’re feeling, and what you’re struggling with.
Maybe this post will help you do that one day.
Talking about it and acknowledging how you’re feeling is such an important step.
Written by, James Hunt
Hailing from the UK, James is an award winning autism blogger, podcaster and father of two autistic boys. His ‘Stories About Autism’ blog is a raw and insightful glimpse into life for their family. He shares stories of their everyday lives, the highs, the lows, and everything in between. Follow him on Facebook and Instagram at Stories About Autism.
Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook, subscribe for exclusive videos, and subscribe to our newsletter.
