This Is Regression
This is the hardest week I remember in a long time.
This is regression. This is aggression. This is self-injuring. This is our hardest hard.
This is all hands on deck.
This is researching, brainstorming, spending every waking moment trying to figure out what and why.
This is phone calls to doctors, questioning med dosages, trying to figure out the mysteries of autism, cursing nonverbal, and worrying.
This is praying and sleepless nights.
This is losing him.
This is fighting for him.
This is putting safety plans in place. And juggling two other little boys.
This is never giving up hope. This is reminding myself he will get better.
This is our whole world stopping to focus on him.
This is anxiety so high it would drop some of you to your knees.
This is taking a kick willingly because you know he can’t help it. And it’s better than him hurting himself.
This is watching someone slipping away and holding on so tight and never letting go.
This is 47 unanswered text messages and 7 voicemails. This is not showering. This is surviving.
This is our reality. This is our life.
This is a little boy who is loved and treasured. A little boy with a family behind him who will never stop.
This is our secret world. This is feeling shame and guilt. This is needing people to understand that we are just surviving right now. Nothing more. But understand too that we will make it. We will always make it but we are allowed to say it’s hard too.
This is preaching ‘find the joy’ and wondering at 3 am where that is.
This is love so fierce and so real. This is our life.
Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook, subscribe for exclusive videos, and subscribe to our newsletter.
