Today, Be A Tiny Bit Selfish
Have you had them yet? The days that are a little harder to get out of bed, maybe because there’s nowhere to be or maybe because you just don’t want to. Not yet.
The hot showers interrupted by the yelling outside the door, quickly followed by the thought of “I just don’t want to parent today.”
Or maybe it’s the little moments that hit hard. The Zoom birthday parties that are missing all the elements of an actual celebration. Or having to say no when your kid innocently asks to go to the park and then shrugs and says sadly, “oh yeah. I forgot.”
Maybe it’s just knowing that right now, you are all the things. You are a parent, meal prepper, snack giver, teacher, therapist and advocate all day every day. And you know you can be everything to your kids. Maybe not up to your own standards and expectations, but it is possible.
Here’s the other piece to that. Being all the things means giving 100% all the time. 100% of you goes to parenting. 100% goes to teaching. 100% goes to being a makeshift therapist. 100% goes into advocating.
And that’s 400% of you all day, every day just to raise your kids, without taking into account other things like jobs, finances, housework, caring for pets, maintaining a relationship, and self care.
Not to mention navigating through constantly changing information, wondering if our livelihoods will survive, and hoping that whatever steps are taken next won’t put us or our loved ones at risk.
Tell me, how does this work exactly? When we combine the factors and 1000% of us is being given in a single day?
Well, it doesn’t. So stop. Take a minute to breathe. Your kids are okay.
Are they loved? Are they safe? You’re doing an amazing job and they are OKAY.
You’ve lost a little of yourself lately, haven’t you? I know I have. It’ll come back. The world will look a little different when this is over, but that’s not always a bad thing. This is temporary.
So find a minute to take care of your needs, and tomorrow find 2 minutes. Everything will still be there when you get back.
Our definition of parenting falls under a world that doesn’t even exist anymore. And we are doing only what we can with what we have been given. Right now, that’s more than enough.
So today, be a tiny bit selfish. It’s the most selfless decision you can make. Because it means tomorrow, you’ll be available.
Written by, Caitlin Downs
Caitlin Downs is a stay at home mom to two kids, ages 6 and 3. Her youngest is in the process of medical and developmental testing and observation through multiple specialists. You can follow her blog page at https://www.facebook.com/tomorrowwewillstartagain/
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