When the Birthday Invites Stop
Every time I see a mama happy and hopeful because their kid was invited to a birthday party it floods me with memories.
And I want to tell them to enjoy them now because the invitations will stop.
Kya was invited to every single birthday party in kindergarten.
Birthday parties were incredibly stressful.
And I went over the top on her parties.
I thought if I made them amazing then maybe the kids would include her.
I spent $1500 on her 5th Birthday and that was ridiculous.
I realized I was doing it for me not Kya.
She didn’t enjoy the chaos and she didn’t want to sit and open gifts.
What she wanted to do was cover her ears and pace the room.
That was the time when aggression was beginning and a whole new world was opening.
And I was becoming emerged in Autism.
All of it.
But mostly the hard side.
The side no one wants to talk about.
The aggression was so unpredictable and unknown.
Kindergarten was a time I found myself the most scared and confused.
Once in school Kya no longer blended in and her Autism was front and centre.
Kids don’t notice the differences early on.
Kids don’t notice the glaring differences that were suddenly standing out staring me in the face.
Kids don’t notice but parents do.
And suddenly you have nothing in common with the chattering moms at school drop off.
As the year came to an end so did the party invites.
And in a way I was relieved.
To be completely honestly, I was glad.
All these memories are crashing down as we are approaching Kya’s 10th Birthday and what she really wants is a party with all the kids in her class.
These kids are incredibly kind to her, but will they really come to her party?
Kids her age aren’t into Elmo, Peppa Pig or watching Annie nonstop so trying to plan something that would interest them and make Kya happy has me stumped.
I asked her wat she wants to do, and she said kids party and named every kid in her class, so I hope their kindness extends past the classroom.
My heart can’t take it otherwise.
Where has the time gone? How is she turning 10?
Let the party planning begin.
Anyone have any ideas?
On we go.
Written by, Jennifer Dunn
My name is Jennifer Dunn, I am the mother of a beautiful 9 year old girl with ASD. Kya and I live in Vancouver, Canada. I work full-time and also manager her team of therapists. Our weekends are mostly filled with therapy, but I am happy to be on this journey with my Bug. I share our journey at https://www.facebook.com/keepingupwithkya/
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