Our Kids are Life Long Learners

If I could go back in time, 6 years ago, and tell myself one thing and one thing only…it would be…

Let me paint the picture for you first. I was just given a lifelong diagnosis for my child but no direction on how to help him. I was a scared mama.

I was 28. This was my first baby. We lived in rural Minnesota and there was no help. No other kids like our son.

I wasn’t hearing positive things either.

Instead I was told things like, he will never ride a bike or make a friend and some kids never talk or graduate. And get ready for the fight of your life.

Um. Scary.

I wasn’t told about the beauty. The joy. Or even that my son will thrive in his own way.

If I could I tell that scared woman one thing, and one thing only, it would be…you have time my friend. Nothing but time. Breathe. And dig in.

See, our kids are lifelong learners.

If they don’t learn the alphabet by age 4 or how to read by age 6, that’s ok. It doesn’t mean it will never happen. And that goes for potty training and getting dressed and all the other things we need to learn.

You know those milestone checklists? You fill them out at the doctor. They show up in your email inbox too. They tell you what your child should be doing.

They are important. Yes.

But they aren’t the tell all or end all.

My son is 9 and he still can’t ride a bike. Every day we practice using a fork and putting on shoes and pulling up pants and writing his name.

He can’t read that we know of…although I know for a fact he can read Family Feud on the guide on the tv because he never lets me skip over it if it’s on.

And while he can’t write a sentence, he can type ‘trains’ into Amazon Prime.

He knows his letters too. And his shapes and numbers and colors. He may not tell you so much but he knows them.

He isn’t playing the recorder or reading chapter books or learning naughty things on the bus like all the other third graders are. Not yet.

But, he can waddle like a penguin and wash his hands all by himself. That’s a pretty big deal if you ask me.

But there’s a lot that he doesn’t know. That he should know. And that’s ok.

Because we have years to learn all of it. It doesn’t need to happen by age 3 or 5 or today or even tomorrow. We got time.

Parents, try and relax. Just keep setting those goals and working towards them.

He may learn to ride a bike at age 30. Or write a sentence or wash his own hair at 25. And how amazing would that be? It won’t mean any less because he achieved it late.

In fact, I have a feeling it may be even more amazing. And this mama will celebrate twice as much.

Please remember, these kids, these unique, beautiful, in-their-own-time kids, have a lifetime to learn this stuff.

Give it time. Because I’m pretty sure they are going to amaze us.

Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook, subscribe for exclusive videos, and subscribe to our newsletter.