Why I am Thankful for my Special Needs Daughter
I am thankful for my special needs daughter.
I should probably clarify.
I’m thankful for my daughter…not the special needs.
I’m not a parent who says that I wouldn’t make life easier for her if I could. I would. But that’s a topic for another post.
Today is about a golden birthday and it’s about being thankful. It’s a lesson that I’ve learned over the years about perspective.
Today, November 12th, is my daughter Liz’s 12th birthday!
Liz has a rare genetic mutation and along with that has come a list of diagnoses including autism spectrum disorder, ADHD, epilepsy, developmental delay and cognitive delay.
She also has expressive language disorder, which means that I have never heard her say “mama” or “I love you”.
Her birthday used to be a hard day for me. It was a reminder that time was moving on, even though I felt like it was standing still.
With each birthday, the gap widened between Liz and her typical peers of the same age.
I don’t remember exactly when it happened, but several years ago I learned from Liz that I had a choice.
I could either focus on this list of diagnoses and everything that she “couldn’t” do or I could focus on being thankful for my beautiful daughter and how amazing she is.
Now with each birthday, I celebrate all of the amazing things about Liz that I am thankful for.
Today on her golden birthday, I wanted to share just a few of these things with all of you with the hope that perhaps it will help someone else to learn the power of perspective and to see the gifts of joy and love in their own lives.
I am thankful for the way that Liz loves with her whole heart. We see this in the way that she wants to be close to us and by the great hugs that she gives.
She is teaching us how to love better than we ever knew possible.
I am thankful for the way that Liz forgives us when we get it wrong. It’s another example of how she is teaching us to love unconditionally.
I am thankful for the way she makes us laugh. She likes to be silly and reminds us not to take things too seriously. There’s nothing better than the sound of her giggles.
I am thankful for the way that she faces each day with optimism. She is the most excited kid walking into school each morning and I have always counted that as a great blessing.
I am thankful that she has made us stronger as a family. We have always had to stick together and by doing so, we have formed a bond that is hard to put into words.
I am thankful for the way that Liz hugs total strangers. She hugs the nurse who gives her a flu shot each year. She hugs the ride attendants at amusement parks.
She looks at name tags and she wants to know each person’s name.
In fact, she is on a first name basis with many of the employees at Target and she hugs many of them too. She reminds me that every single person is deserving of love.
I am thankful for the people who are accepting of this love.
I am thankful for the way that Liz goes with the flow. This has allowed us to do so much as a family because she is happy as long as we are all together. This ability has also allowed her to transition to new school and therapy environments without missing a beat.
I am thankful for the way that Liz helps me to see the beauty in the little things, like stopping to look at the stars in the sky or pointing with excitement to the twinkling Christmas lights.
I am thankful for the other special needs families that we have met and the friends that we have made because of Liz.
I am thankful that in so many ways she has made us better people. We respect other people with differences and we have compassion for those with disabilities.
Sadly, it’s a way of thinking that we never really knew until there was Liz.
I am thankful that Liz is full of joy and that she reminds me to see the joy in the every day moments. She reminds me that how you experience each day is all about your perspective.
Happy Birthday my sweet Liz.
Thank you for making our lives so much richer than we ever could have imagined. You are a true gift and a blessing to so many.
My birthday wish for you is that you always know how very much you are loved.
Written by, Dr. Carrie Kremer
My name is Dr. Carrie Kremer. My husband and I are both physicians and we have 3 children ages 12, 14 and 16. On our Facebook page Lessons from Liz, I write about our youngest daughter Liz. I enjoy sharing the lessons that we are learning from her unique outlook on life! If you have a special needs child or you just have days when you struggle to see the bright side, I would love for you to follow our journey on Facebook at Lessons from Liz. https://www.facebook.com/lessonsfromliz/.
Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook, subscribe for exclusive videos, and subscribe to our newsletter.
