Traveling with Severe Autism

We just got back from a 3-day trip to Washington, DC. To say that I was dreading this trip would be an understatement. Plane rides, security checks, hotels, crosswalks, crowds, the unknown – all of this is so overwhelming for our family.

You see, we have three amazing kids, but Drew, our 13-year-old son, has severe autism. He is non-verbal and really doesn’t like to venture very far outside of his routine and typical home/school/therapy environments. Or does he?

This trip literally started off with a disaster of the epic variety. Drew had a MAJOR bathroom accident on the seat of the plane while in the air on the way to DC. It was horrible! My husband had to clean him up the best he could and then walk him to the bathroom at the back of the plane. All with a few minutes to spare before landing.

The United flight attendant was an angel. She gave us boxes of antibacterial wipes and said with a smile, “Don’t worry, the hazmat team will clean the whole plane once we land.” The loud guy in the back of the plane literally shook my hand and said, “You’re doing a great job.”

I’m sure people were annoyed with the whole situation, but they were also very compassionate.

Then we got to DC. I didn’t realize how many security checkpoints we would have to go through at all of the monuments and museums. Don’t get me wrong, I love that all of these checks are in place, it’s just that we have to explain Drew’s autism at each stop. I was always in the front and my husband in the back, the three kids in the middle.

Each time I said, “That boy in the headphones is my son. He has severe autism, so he won’t speak to you and probably won’t follow your directions,” to the guards at the security checkpoints, we were met with kindness and smiles. It was so much easier than I expected.

We bought tickets to ride on a trolley bus so we could take breaks around the city as needed. We were right on the edge of a family breakdown, when one of the buses came up beside us at the Capital Building. If you are traveling with a special needs child in DC, I highly recommend purchasing tickets like these so you can take a breath and get off your feet for a while. We were all in a much better mood after sitting and listening to the hilarious tour guide for 30 minutes before getting off at the Lincoln Memorial.

We decided to treat ourselves to a fancy dinner at a steakhouse that we’d heard about from friends. We knew it was going to be a challenge, but you only live once, right? The maitre’d called our name and we walked into the beautiful 2-story dining room filled with people. As the maitre’d noticed how my husband helped Drew take off his coat, he looked at me and said, “Would a booth work best for you?”

I nodded and he took us to one of the best tables in the restaurant – a corner booth that was elevated just a bit so you could see out over the entire room. That was not supposed to be our table, but I’m so thankful he put us there.

Once again, the kindness of a stranger made a difference for us.

The trip definitely had its highs and lows. There were moments of complete exhaustion and I’m pretty sure my husband and I didn’t even sit next to each other the whole trip. We were constantly trying to keep track of the kids and make sure Drew wasn’t overwhelmed in the moment. But we all got to experience Washington, DC for the first time together as a family.

All three of my children will have these memories for a lifetime.

A few years ago we wouldn’t have even attempted this trip because Drew (and the rest of us) weren’t ready. But we’re starting to venture out into the world again.

Not only did our kids surprise us (Drew walked over 6 miles in DC in one day), we realized the world might be a more welcoming and understanding place than we thought.

Written by, Jackie Shelton

Jackie’s son was diagnosed at age two with autism. Jackie lives in Indiana with her amazing husband, Michael, and three outstanding children: Sidney (14), Drew (13) and Kyle (8).

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Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook and subscribe to our newsletter.