My Autistic Son’s Peers
There is nothing I love more on this earth than my son. And I like to believe that Jamie and I are past the grieving that goes into having a disabled child. I truly do. We have two beautiful children. Wonderful lives. We are blessed and happy.
We don’t think about how our lives are different because of autism. We don’t dwell on the fact that our son doesn’t speak. Or that he can’t really leave the house. He’s not our ‘autistic’ son. He’s just our son. Our lives are not less. Just different.
Cooper and I waiting patiently for brother to get up!
I want you to know we are in a good place. We truly are. But each of us has triggers. You know…the thing that brings that dull ache to your stomach. It’s almost impossible to describe to the outside world.
For me, it’s seeing typical boys who are the exact same age as my son. Watching them play, speak, move around, interact. Because in reality, my son is closer to 2 years old. He doesn’t do things a 7 year old does. Seeing them…hurts. It still takes my breath away.
And just when I think I’m past it…I’ll see my friend’s son growing up. I’ll have a conversation with him. I’ll see his future. I’ll experience the ‘shoulds, coulds, woulds, and almosts.
And boom. I feel the dull ache of wanting something so badly. The immediate flood of emotions. The ‘it’s not fair’ and ‘why my baby?’
I’ll never get over that. Never ever.
If you feel like being mean to me please just unfollow. This is real and sad. And I’m feeling it 100% today. And it’s not about love or hope. Because I have more of those two emotions than most people. I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t.
Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook and subscribe to our newsletter.
Hi,
I am an occupational therapist working on a school district. I came across your video blog on the today show and checked out your website. First of all, you are amazing! Know that! I am in awe of what you do! Second, what a joy your 2 boys must be! They always are dressed so cute in the pics with smiles on….the dogs walking around ( I am a huge dog person) ….the slime making …the water parks…and on and on! You are giving your boys a wonderful , rich life!
I have learned so much from you already that I incorporate in my daily therapy sessions with students! A 30 minute session can wear me down. This is your life!
My daughter who is now almost 13, totally typical, and a softball star was born at 32.5 weeks. A doctor came in before my emergency c-section and said …your baby can be brain damages,blind, take seizures, be developmentally delayed,have physical disabilities and on and on …..I was in similar shoes for a few hours …I never felt such fear…. as an OT, I knew exactly what this meant! It meant a life time of hospitals & therapy & doctors etc…. and for all the times in meetings I would tell parents , don’t limit your child based on a dx….I was terrified ….powerless …..
I just want to let you know that you are making a difference! Your honesty is brave! You are NOT alone! I hear parents say these things all the time! But, your are their voice! I look forward to the posts and videos and celebrating all of the gains & milestones….because he will get there! You see in the videos how smart he is. ..how loved he is ….how happy he is ….how happy your other son is!
You should very proud! Please ignore any negative feedback!!! You are a voice to so many parents & they need this! Truth can be hard to hear sometimes & it takes a very brave person to speak it!