My Son Is Not Broken, My Son Has Autism

My son has Autism. Whew, boy does that feel good to put it out there!

I’ve had an internal battle with myself whether that was something that I wanted to put out there for everyone to know, but I’ve finally asked myself why?? Am I ashamed? Absolutely not. Am I seeking sympathy? That is the last thing I want. So why? Why put it out there so vulnerably?

My Son has Autism

The answer is simple….for my son. It is all just for him. I’m doing it in hopes that I can open people’s eyes about autism, as I’ve learned many people don’t understand it. I was one of them. Heck, I’m still learning everyday. It’s not a journey that I ever planned on taking but I have an amazing boy leading me the way and I wouldn’t change it for the world.

So this post is for you….It’s for the person sitting across from us in a restaurant staring at my son as he enjoys his food. The kicking and hand flapping and the very loud humming coming from him may be uncomfortable for you, but let me assure you, all that you’re watching is my son expressing how much he’s enjoying it. And if you happen to see my husband and I break out in cheer because he took a bite of food, odds are it’s the first time he’s ever tried it. Ever! Which means it was something other than French fries, grilled cheese, or chicken nuggets which are the only meals he’s eaten since starting solid food.

This post is for the person behind us in the grocery store checkout line trying to talk to him and giving me the “why doesn’t he say anything” look and me having to explain that he is nonverbal and that it’s a good day if I even hear the word “mama” from his sweet voice. A voice that I’m not even entirely familiar with and I’m with him every single day. It’s for the adolescent boy who’s pointing him out to his friends only for me to overhear him say to them ‘that kid is deaf.’

And this post is for the fellow mothers sitting in my daughter’s dance class, watching as we enter and witnessing my son fall to the ground and scream and pound the ground because he is going through sensory overload with all your screaming kids running around.

I see you. I hear you. And it hurts. Everyday is a new day for us, a new discovery, a new victory.

I am his Voice

I’m thankful for the support I have, but it’s still hard. It’s hard because as a parent you want to protect your children from everything, and then life throws something like autism in the mix and it’s a whole other feeling of wanting to protect your child from the ugliness of the world. Unfortunately, you can’t protect them from everything, but you can be your child’s voice. And that’s what I’m prepared to be. I will be his voice, and I will be his advocate.

Our future is unknown, but I know what potential this little boy has and I have no doubt that he will move mountains. And I will be right by his side the entire way.

So, if you read anything today, read this. Because these kids are not broken. They don’t need to be fixed.

We as a society and how we treat one another is what needs to be fixed. So, please be kind, you never know what battles someone may be facing and you cannot judge until you’ve walked a mile in their shoes.

Written by Jamie Rittenour

My name is Jamie and I have two beautiful babies; Kenzie is seven and my social butterfly with a heart of gold and Jackson is my sweet and goofy three year old. We received Jackson’s diagnosis almost a year ago, and afterwards I felt lost. We live in a small town, and autism wasn’t something we knew anything about. This was the first post I’d ever written about Jackson. When it was getting harder to “hide” his autism. I’m so glad I did it. The response I had from our small community was overwhelming and such a positive experience.

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Finding Cooper’s Voice is a safe, humorous, caring and honest place where you can celebrate the unique challenges of parenting a special needs child. Because you’re never alone in the struggles you face. And once you find your people, your allies, your village….all the challenges and struggles will seem just a little bit easier. Welcome to our journey. You can also follow us on Facebook and subscribe to our newsletter.