The Isolation
I took the boys to the beach this past weekend to soak up some of the last bits of summer. The beach is kind of our place to go. Cooper does his thing and I play with Sawyer. Cooper loves the sand and will spend hours (if I let him) throwing rocks and sand into the water. So yes, it is best if we go when no one else is there. He doesn’t notice if people are in the way. He just throws.
This is the isolation I always talk about. We may be getting out of the house but we only go places without other people.
I took this video for Instagram and it ended up being a lot more sad then I expected it to be. Sawyer and I are building a sand castle and digging roads. We are enjoying each others company. And Cooper is throwing rocks and sand. I probably prompt him a dozen times to come play with us but he doesn’t hear me. He’s in his own world. And while I am happy that he is happy…we miss him.
Screw talking….just come sit with us Cooper. We miss you.
If it feels good he does it. I see..I want…I take …I do = instant gratification. That’s my boy. From what I can determine from my son when I ask him is he does hear me but he’s enjoying his thing:) Sigh.
I’m in a similar position because I have a little girl with three years younger than my son. I feel your sadness. As a younger sibling gets older what I found is that they will try to push the agenda and bring the older sibling into the games. I would say that works 50% of the time:) he still gets frustrating but unfortunately it is what it is and that’s what I keep telling myself.
The thing I do to break into my sons world when he’s doing something like that is…. I just copy what he’s doing. I don’t say a thing I just do what he’s doing. I do that until I noticed him sneaking glances at me. If he enjoys what I’m doing he will just let me do that beside him… But we’re parallel playing. God for bid I try to show him what to do instead. The road block comes up big time.
I think the thing that I found as my son became more verbal is all the times in the past when I thought he wasn’t paying attention because he was doing his own thing…. I was wrong. It’s just that in his mind what he was doing he liked more and lacked the social skills to show or tell me that. The difference now is he will say “mommy I don’t want to stop bothering me.” Ouch!!