Archive for August 2015
There are Two Kinds of Autism Moms….
Just because shits been getting a little heavy in my world… I had a good nights sleep and woke up to Super Cooper carrying a picture around of our family. That kid has an element of sweetness and love I’ve never seen before. As I made my coffee he grabbed my hand and pointed to my face in the picture, giggled and then hugged my leg. And then my heart actually exploded. Damn you kid. Just when I was going to give up you sucked me back in. …
Read MoreWhen Do We Give Up?
I gave up yesterday. The details really don’t matter I guess. All that matters is I was pushed to that place where I didn’t recognize myself. I’m fighting with Cooper’s school and for the first time I saw that they are looking at him as a number and not a child. All the horror stories I’ve read about schools and special needs kids happened. I spent hours talking to people that have never met Cooper….nor do they really care about his best interest. Cooper is a special child with special…
Read MorePotty Training Desperation
I’ve reached my limit with potty training Cooper. I’ve exhausted all options that I know of. I need help. I am waving the white flag. Or crying in front of the toilet after being kicked in the shins. Either one. There are good things happening. The kid does not want to wear a diaper…especially a wet one. He takes it off if we put one on him. And here’s the kicker. He stays dry. He has excellent bladder control. And when he has to pee he will bring us a…
Read MoreWhat If I Lose Him…
One of my greatest fears is losing Cooper. He’s not necessarily a runner or a wanderer, which are traits highly associated with autism, but still….the fear is real. Cooper will most likely not call out if he is lost. Or answer to his name. Or come running. Or even recognize the fear of being lost. And Cooper looks like a completely average little boy and his disability may net even be recognized. So as Cooper has aged, his dad and I know that there will most likely come a time…
Read MoreI Don't Know What's Wrong
I made the decision when Cooper started at Fraser that either Jamie or I would pick him up 5 days a week. I did this because Cooper is nonverbal. And he is getting highly intensive therapy 5 days a week. And if I don’t pick him up I have no idea what is happening in his world. Imagine never being able to ask your kid how their day was. Or what they did. It really, really stinks. So every single day, either Jamie or I, sit in the Fraser parking…
Read MoreWhat I am Missing….
I spend a lot of time thinking about all the things I’ve missed with Cooper. I know…he doesn’t know…he’s happy…he’s not missing out…blah, blah, blah. Those three things top my list of ‘What not to say to an Autism mom.’ But I know. I see it everyday in Sawyer. I know what I am missing. It’s a whole life. It’s language and emotion and socialization and laughter and interaction. I am missing it all. It comes in waves. Sawyer and I were looking through his baby book last night. We…
Read MoreCranioSacral Therapy For Children
I’m not always up for trying new therapy’s with Cooper. And there are MANY reasons why. First, they are expensive. A lot of therapies are not covered by insurance. Pre-autism I was unaware of the black hole of death that is health insurance. When you don’t need it….but have it…it’s great. When you have it…and need it…and your kid needs everything…it can be very tough. Second, no therapy that you want to try will ever be conveniently located or at a time that works. It’s the truth. Plus, my kid…
Read MoreFound this Quote….
I found this quote today on Pinterest and it jumped off the page to me. While I don’t believe that God only gives special kiddos to parents that can handle it…I DO BELIEVE I am blessed to be Super Cooper’s mom. And my life’s work is to make sure he is happy, safe and has the best life possible.
Read MoreFor An Autistic Kiddo…
I often question how much I should push Cooper. And motivate him. And I really ask myself how much I should expect from him. If I completely lower my standards than I feel that I have given up on him. And his future. But I also can’t expect him to behave like a typical kid. Those skills are not there. I had Cooper’s yearly evaluation at Fraser last week. It went pretty well. He has really, really improved in the last year. I heard a lot of comments on how…
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